Every workplace has a moment when a boss turns a small thing into a big thing: the email with the pointed tone, the meeting where you are the only one corrected, the rule that somehow applies to you and nobody else. If that sounds familiar, take a breath. You cannot control how a boss behaves, but you have far more say than you think over what that behavior does to you. Here are six quiet, no-drama tactics for keeping your head clear and your sense of self intact, plus a note on when a bad habit turns into something worth writing down.

1. Separate their behavior from your worth

When someone with power is petty, it feels like a grade on your performance. It usually is not. Power-trip behavior says far more about the person’s stress, insecurity or habits than it does about you. Picture a boss who rewrites your report for the third time, changing nothing but a few commas. That is not a review of your talent. That is a person who needs to feel in charge of something today.

Try a simple mental line: “That was about them, not me.” Say it silently as often as you need. It sounds almost too easy, but it keeps their mood from turning into your identity. You can do good work, learn from fair feedback and still refuse to treat someone else’s bad day as a verdict on you.

2. Do not take the bait

Power trips run on reactions. A sigh, a snappy reply or a long, defensive explanation is exactly the fuel they are looking for. Calm, short and factual answers are the opposite. Say your boss sends a message at 4:55 PM saying, “Why isn’t this done?” when the deadline is Friday. You do not need a three-paragraph defense. “It is on track for Friday. I will send it by noon” is plenty.

There is nothing in that reply to push against. Boring is a superpower here. Think of yourself as a very polite brick wall: friendly, steady and not interested in a wrestling match. Over time, many people give up on a game that nobody plays back.

3. Keep a private record of your own reality

Sometimes the story gets rewritten: “I never said that,” or “You were told last week.” A short private note to yourself with the date and what actually happened keeps you grounded. If a boss says in the morning that the project is due Tuesday and insists in the afternoon that they always said Monday, your note says Tuesday, and you can quietly stay sure of what you know.

This is not a case file or a plan for anything. It is just your own sanity log, so that when someone tells you the sky is green, you can remember that it is blue. Keep it somewhere private and personal, such as a notebook at home, and not on a work computer or account.

4. Decide which battles deserve a battle

Not every eye roll deserves a response, and not every odd request is a hill to stand on. Before you react, ask a quick question: “Will this matter in a month?” If your boss insists on a new font for the weekly update, the answer is almost certainly no. Change the font, smile and save your energy.

The goal is not to become a doormat. It is to be selective, so that when something does matter, such as an unfair workload or a task that does not belong to you, you are rested enough to deal with it clearly. Think of your patience as a budget. Spend it on things that are worth the price.

5. Find your people

Nothing resets your perspective like a trusted friend, family member or former coworker who says, “No, that is not normal, and no, you are not crazy.” Power-trip behavior thrives in silence, because it can make you wonder whether you are the one overreacting. Saying it out loud to someone you trust often takes the air out of it right away.

Talk it out over coffee, on a walk or on a long drive. A sympathetic ear and a good laugh about the absurdity can turn a heavy week into a manageable one. Bonus points if they have survived a boss like yours and have stories that make yours sound mild.

6. Protect your off-hours

The best counterweight to a bad work day is a good evening. Guard your time away from work: the walk around the block, the garden, the ball game, the dinner with people you like, the hobby that has nothing to do with spreadsheets. If you answer every late-night message out of nerves, you are handing extra hours to the very behavior that is wearing you down.

When your life has plenty of places where you are valued, one difficult person at the office shrinks to their proper size. Your worth is not up for review every Monday morning. It is established by the rest of your life, and a quiet Saturday can remind you of that.

When annoying becomes worth documenting

Most petty bosses are just that: petty. But sometimes a pattern goes beyond irritating. If the behavior is aimed at you repeatedly, if it involves threats, humiliation, unsafe conditions, pressure to break a rule, or treatment tied to who you are, it is time to take it more seriously. That does not mean picking a fight. It means protecting yourself calmly and on the record.

Keep doing your sanity log, but add the details that matter: dates, times, what was said or sent, and who else was present. Stick to facts, not feelings or guesses. Save work messages that are relevant to the matter and keep copies of your own performance feedback. If you decide to raise it, you can do so in a short, factual and polite way with the person or office at your workplace that handles these things, such as human resources or a manager above your boss. If you are unsure of your rights or options, a local legal aid office, a workers’ rights group or a licensed employment attorney can explain them. And if the stress is affecting your health or sleep, it is perfectly reasonable to talk with a doctor or counselor.

The bottom line

Difficult bosses come and go, but you are the one who stays with yourself the whole time, so look after that person. Stay calm, stay curious and keep your sense of humor, because a quiet smile is hard to argue with. And if all else fails, remember that nobody has ever been remembered fondly for being the boss who sent the passive-aggressive email.

This article is general, lighthearted advice about staying mentally steady at work. It is not legal, human resources or medical advice. If you ever feel unsafe, harassed or seriously overwhelmed, consider talking with a trusted professional or counselor.